; linger

So I woke up, sick to the bone with phlgem in my nose, throat and a throbbing hot forehead after a terrible dream of abandonment.

Receieved a friendster msg from your friend, the one reason how we got close in Nov, 2004.

And I clicked my connections to him, and I saw the many mutual friends we shared.

I scrolled further south and I saw more friends and acquaintances that weren't on my friendster. Second-degree friendster friends that I was and still am too lazy to add.

Then I saw your name, and your numerous connections to me.

It didn't register at first, and then it struck, struck me hard.

Deleted.

I changed my msn nick.

I did something I've stopped doing since I got over you. I logged into his account and I looked at your nickname. And I can't help but smile. Cos both were about stabbing of the back. Such coincidence.

Everyone thought time would heal or at least lessen the hostility, but I knew better. And I thank God for the boy's sensitivity that I wasn't at Gardens, and had to face you that fateful day.

Even after every bad and nasty thing you've done to me, and trust me I've heard enough, I don't need to ask around to hear more, I forgive you. I didn't mean for the proclamation I made when I claimed to hate you. I would still take bullets for you, my dear friend. And I still wish for the easy and warm friendship we had back then.

I wasn't asking for the world.