; waiting

Got this from Jols blog. Was a good read, after quite awhile. Never been close, but for some reason I've always felt that given the chance, we could. Sometimes she says the exact thing I'm feeling, and she's one of those rare individuals that I feel is.. real. I don't know how to put it, just.. real. (:

10 cranky things

10 things I always wanted to say to 10 different people but never could.

o1. sometimes i wonder why you abuse me the way you do. i know i'm difficult but it all boils down to the fact that i love you and life has moulded me to the person i now am, and i wish you could accept it and try to make it all better.

o2. whatever did i do to make you go from loving to hating me, the way you do after almost a year?

o3. occasionally you drive me to an extreme state of piqued-ness. sometimes i wanna tell you that you're the stupidest person in the world for disregarding my advice and getting hurt. other times i feel sorry, and simply try to be there to catch you when you fall.

o4. i miss you and i wish i was more important to you. maybe i'm bad for you, my emoness and my crazy smoking habits. but thank you nontheless, for sticking around, sometimes.

o5. people don't hate you for no reason. you think too much of yourself. look back, reflect, and think of the reason why people do.

o6. it's terrible that we once called each other best friend and now you call me only when you need my help.

o7. when will you learn? last year you made your mistake with me, and now you're breaking her heart all over again. 3years is a long time, but i wonder why she loves you the way she does. i really do.

o8. it's been four years since we knew each other. given another chance, if i played my cards right, would i be happier now, will i be good enough?

o9. what do you get outta a loveless fuck? no seriously, i wanna know.

10. i'm in so much constant pain, will you be the one to save me?